american sex education be like
UI JUST SPIT OUT MY JUICE
Octopuses are going to kill us all someday
I had a biology teacher that told us this story about an octopus at an aquarium in Australia. The staff were concerned because their population of crustaceans kept disappearing. No bodies or anything. So they checked the video feed to find out what’s up.
Across from the the crustacean tank was a small octopus tank. This little fucker squeezed out of a tiny hole at the top of his tank, walk across the hall, and get into the crustacean tank. He would then hunt and eat. After he was done, he crawled back out and get back in his tank
Here’s the kicker: security guards patrolled the area. The staff realized that the octopus had memorized the security’s routine. It would escape and be back between the guards’ round.
An octopus in Germany was annoyed by a bright light shining into his tank, so he climbed up over the rim and squirted water at it to short it.
Fuckin’ octopuses, man.
”I’ll just sit here and wait for dinner, okay?”
Photos by ©Shrampton
a text I did not think I would ever have to send
stick around for the surprise ending
Imagine that one day the whole world would look like this.
a headline from my perfect world
"Sometimes I think I have felt everything I’m ever gonna feel, and from here on out I’m not gonna feel anything new– just lesser versions of what I’ve already felt."
You’re allowed to be sad, but please don’t think that nobody loves you.